I’m a married woman with a young son. I recently got in touch with my first ex. I met him 20 years ago and for some reason we didn't become much closer and it has always been a void in my heart.
Recently we got in touch again, exchanging photos and started to have conversations. And the connection just got deeper and deeper. He is married with kids as well.
He talked about meeting up and I know it is the wrong thing to do. I tried two times to tell him we cannot meet and we should talk less. But somehow, we couldn't resist talking to each other.
I tried to work with my husband by communicating more. We even tried some therapy to learn better skills. But I still feel there is a distance or wall between us. My husband is a very loving father, but he cares for his son the most and sometimes I feel very lonely since we do not talk much.
He is also an alcoholic who needs his wine every night. I tried to persuade him to drink less and maybe we could go on a date. We haven’t had any intimacy for 2 years (ever since my son was born).
So my heart is torn. One part of me wants to meet him and see if there is attraction between us. Another part of me knows this is a very bad thing to do and I ought to stop.